


our secret ceremonials

by bergamot (madocallie)



Series: only if for a night [2]
Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Body Image, Crimson Flower Spoilers, Established Relationship, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Canon, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-26
Updated: 2020-11-08
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:02:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 13,326
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27207826
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madocallie/pseuds/bergamot
Summary: But... one thing still struck Byleth as odd.The weather was fair outside, and the bedroom was anything but cold.Why was Edelgard still wearing her full regalia?_____A sequel towe'll build our altar here.
Relationships: Edelgard von Hresvelg/My Unit | Byleth
Series: only if for a night [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1986349
Comments: 22
Kudos: 154
Collections: Edeleth Big Bang 2020





	1. a question

Though it was only their first day off, Byleth could tell that Edelgard was more at ease than ever. Usually, her wife’s brow was furrowed; even on the best of days, something frustrated her. 

Today, she was smiling softly. 

From her window-sill seat, Byleth watched Edelgard as she sat on their canopy bed. She was burying herself in one of the many short novels that she had plucked from the shelves of the imperial library. Beside her sat a couple of stuffed toys: a fluffy armored bear and a downy rabbit. Edelgard owned many stuffed animals, and cycled between them to make sure they received all received an equal amount of love.

Though Byleth had little knowledge of Fódlan’s literature, the novel Edelgard read looked like an adaptation of _The Luna Knight’s Tale._ She wondered if Ashe had anything to do with her wife’s choice of book. The two did have a meeting a couple of days ago….

On the night-table beside Edelgard was a freshly-opened box of Adrestian confectionery: cookies, chocolates and other sweet little delicacies. Earlier in the day, Byleth had bought the box from a local confectioner to celebrate her wife’s little holiday. The confectioner insisted that the sweets were complimentary for a peace-bringing hero of Fódlan. But Byleth didn’t want his hard work to go uncompensated. So with a little sleight of hand, she secretly stashed a pouchful of gold coins in his apron’s front pocket.

Convincing Edelgard to take a break took an enormous amount of effort. Even after _that_ incident in her office, Byleth still had to heckle her wife to be a little easier on herself. Thankfully, a couple of weeks ago, Edelgard finally gave in to her demands, and declared that she would rest once a month.

But even as the two of them relaxed together, one thing still struck Byleth as odd. 

The weather was fair outside, and the bedroom was anything but cold. Why was Edelgard still wearing her full regalia: armor, cape, crown and all?

This wasn’t the first time Byleth had seen Edelgard’s curiously conservative behavior. When her wife took a bath, she always washed alone. When she went to cities south of Enbarr for political matters, she didn’t dress any lighter. Even her nightgowns were exceedingly modest; with their skirts reaching the floor and their sleeves covering her hands.

None of this could’ve been comfortable for her, could it? 

Byleth tugged at the collar of her blouse. She could only imagine how stuffy her wife felt under all of that gold, steel and cloth. The empty water-glasses stacked at the foot of the bed only furthered Byleth’s suspicions. 

“El, are you alright wearing… all of that?”

At Byleth’s sudden question, Edelgard looked up from her novel, “Pardon?”

“Are you alright wearing… all of _that?_ ” Byleth repeated, gesturing towards her. 

Edelgard frowned quizzically. “What brought this on?”

“Well, um… today’s really hot, and I was wondering if you wanted to get more comfortable…” 

“I’m fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“I said that I was fine, my light.”

This time, it was Byleth’s turn to frown. “Are you _absolutely_ sure?”

Edelgard snapped the novel shut. She leaned her head back against the bed’s headboard; a massive, ornate piece etched with golden roses and the double-headed Adrestian eagle.

“What I wear shouldn’t matter. Don’t you think you’re getting rather intrusive?”

“El…” 

“You still haven’t answered my question. Why are you bringing this up?” Edelgard replied, cutting Byleth off.

“I… don’t know. I just thought that…”

“You just thought what?”

“Nevermind.”

Edelgard gave a great sigh.

“Byleth,” she said slowly, withholding her frustration. “Do you remember the advice box back at the monastery?”

Byleth nodded. She remembered the notes of guidance that she scrawled under the faint glow of the chapel’s candlelight. Admittedly, many of her answers were pure guesswork. Back then, how was she supposed to know how to teach Petra Fódlanian, or comfort Manuela? 

“I sent you a letter once.”

“Oh!” Byleth said. “Was it the one about being afraid of hei-”

“That was _Hubert,_ ” Edelgard said, cutting her off again. “Mine was about... summer weather.”

Byleth’s eyes widened in recognition. 

_You can always put on more clothing when it’s cold,_

_but you can only remove so many layers in the heat._

_How does one survive a hot summer?_

“Right…” Byleth replied. “You told me then, six years ago, that clothing was an issue.”

“And what was your response?”

Byleth scratched her head. “I think… I told you to take a dip?”

Edelgard gave a deep huff of exasperation. “My light, sometimes I wish your memory wasn’t so _foggy._ No, you told me, and I quote: to ‘focus on reading to occupy myself’.”

Byleth’s jaw fell slack, mentally slapping herself for forgetting.

“And that’s what I’m doing now, _my teacher,”_ Edelgard quipped. “I’m simply following your very own advice.”

Even after her wife’s sharp refutation, Byleth still didn’t feel comfortable. If things continued like this, Edelgard would just… _bake_ in her iron cocoon. She had to do something.

“El,” Byleth said. “That advice… I take it back. A lot of things have changed between us since then. And as your wife, I…”

“You… what?”

“I’m not happy letting you sit around like this. Look at how much water you’ve been drinking today.” She tilted her head towards the mahogany bed-end, gesturing at the empty glasses stacked on top. “You’re clearly dehydrated.”

“Byleth, please,” Edelgard muttered, waving her hand in dismissal.

“Please what?”

“...Stop.”

“I’m just worried that—”

“You don’t need to worry about anything _,_ ” said Edelgard, her brow making that familiar crease again. “I’m fine, and I will _continue_ to be fine.”

“But, El-”

“The heat of our chambers must be getting to you,” Edelgard said, hopping off the bed. Gently but firmly, she took Byleth’s wrist. “Why don’t you take a little walk outside? If you want to cool off, there’s plenty of shade in the Imperial gardens.”

“El, I don’t _want_ to go out,” Byleth said helplessly as her wife led her across their room. They both stopped at the entrance, flanked by an imposing pair of ornate doors. 

“Please stop asking,” Edelgard said quietly. “Or I will send you out. I can’t emphasize enough that this is something I don’t wish to discuss further.”

Byleth gave her wife a despondent look. Edelgard wasn’t wrong for getting frustrated: this subject was clearly distressful to her. Maybe it hadn’t been such a good idea to ask her about this. 

But, at the same time... Edelgard lounging around in her regalia didn’t _feel_ right. 

“I just want you to be comfortable,” Byleth muttered. Her throat clenched. Her eyes stang.

Edelgard turned away to fiddle with the golden collar of her dress. 

“I know, my light,” she said softly. “I just...”

“You just... what?”

“I just need some time to myself. To think.”

Byleth nodded quietly. Without thinking, she stepped back into the room. Before she could go any further, she felt a tug on one of her coat-sleeves.

“I said I needed some time to _myself_ ,” warned Edelgard. “It seems you _still_ don’t comprehend the consequences of angering the emperor.”

With a gentle shove, she pushed Byleth out of the room. Before Byleth could turn around, the door’s golden handle clicked shut behind her.

Byleth’s throat clenched. Being sent out so suddenly hurt. Yet Edelgard’s reaction was probably warranted. After all, Byleth _had_ crossed a boundary with her.

Quietly, Byleth made her way to the Imperial gardens. Maybe she needed a break from the summer heat too.


	2. an answer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Worried about Edelgard, Byleth wanders around the palace gardens.
> 
> Then, she receives some surprising news...

It had been three hours since Byleth was banished to the Imperial gardens. She wandered around the sprawling maze of gazebos and blooms, stopping only to watch a caterpillar crawl across the leaf of one of the numerous rose bushes. Edelgard was right: there was plenty of shade here.

Yet despite the beautiful weather or the fragrant flowers, the inescapable weight of guilt sat within Byleth’s chest. It just wouldn’t disappear. 

“I shouldn’t have been so pushy towards El,” Byleth mumbled. No matter how much she tried to distract herself from her mistake, she kept on ruminating. 

She had been pretty insensitive to Edelgard. Why didn't she pay attention to her wife’s feelings? Why didn’t she stop asking her about a subject she clearly didn’t want to discuss? 

At any rate, she had a _lot_ of explaining to do when she got back.

Frustrated, Byleth roughly twirled a lock of coarse hair between her fingers. In the past, this was how she had let off steam. But at Garreg Mach, her habit had earned her several discomforted looks from bystanders; especially students who weren’t familiar with her. Apparently, most people didn’t deal with unspent energy this way.

Thankfully, her wife had been there to help. On Byleth’s bad days, Edelgard didn’t judge her way of finding catharsis, and gave her the space needed to cool off. After all, she did have similar habits.

Byleth continued to play with her hair; so much so that she didn’t notice a familiar shadowy figure approach her from behind. Suddenly, a cold hand clasped her shoulder. Shocked, she turned around.

Oh. It was Hubert.

Though Byleth had a decent relationship with the Minister of the Imperial Household, she would never get used to his unnerving way of announcing his presence. She knew he’d never hurt her, though. Maybe his intimidating aura was just a part of who he was, much like her own lack of expression. Thankfully, he didn’t mind that she was playing with her hair.

Anyways, what was he doing here? Why wasn’t he in the Imperial library, or making some unholy poison in his room, or doing another intimidating Hubert activity? Confused, Byleth quirked an eyebrow at the shadowy man.

“You’re wondering why I’m here, are you not?”

Byleth nodded. Hubert’s lips quirked into a smile. From the dimples on his face, she could tell that it was genuine.

“Lady Edelgard wants to speak with you. In your chambers, apparently.”

Byleth’s eyes widened. “I thought…”

“...that she didn’t want to spend time with you anymore today?” Hubert finished. 

“How… how did you know that?”

“Her Majesty told me as much,” Hubert chuckled. “Right after she… _escorted_ you out, she got frustrated with herself. Then, she asked for me, and after a riveting conversation, she told me where to find you. Now, here we are.”

“I see,” Byleth mumbled. “...Is she still mad at me?”

“I don’t recall that she is.”

Byleth gave an audible sigh of relief. Thank goodness Edelgard wasn’t angry. She’d hate to be on the receiving end of a lecture again, even if it was completely warranted. 

Then, she heard a cough, and Hubert had her attention again. His smile was gone now, and his eyes had narrowed. A chill ran down Byleth’s spine. Maybe she should’ve taken a few pages from his book during her Ashen Demon days. 

“As you are aware,” Hubert said flatly, “Lady Edelgard hates to be kept waiting. I’d appreciate it if you would follow me sooner than later.”

Byleth nodded her head briskly. Together, the two made their way back to the palace.

* * *

As soon as Byleth stopped outside of the chamber room doors, Hubert announced that he had business to attend to. Before she could ask what sort of ‘business’ it was, he teleported himself out of the room. Byleth wondered why he didn’t just teleport her here in the first place. The journey here _had_ taken them half an hour.

Well, it didn’t matter too much. There were more important things at hand.

Slowly, Byleth lifted her hand to give five rhythmic knocks to one of the doors. There was a pause. Then, some shuffling from within. Soon, the door opened with a creak. Through the tiny opening, Edelgard stared back at her.

“El,” Byleth said quietly. “Did you need me?”

Without a word, Edelgard nodded. There was another creak, and the door was now wide enough for Byleth to pass through. Once she was inside, Edelgard closed it again. Then, she made her way to the center of their bedroom, crossing the crimson rug that Claude had sent her as a wedding gift. With a gentle pat of the soft, white duvet, Edelgard beckoned her wife over. At the same time, she settled herself on the edge of her canopy bed. 

Immediately, Byleth noticed that Edelgard had laid out a couple of woollen blankets on top of the bed. Specifically, Byleth’s woollen, itchy, plaid blankets, bought from a village nearby Remire. Her wife _never_ took them out. Was it a symbol of forgiveness? 

Byleth still wasn’t sure, but Edelgard didn’t seem to be angry either. Regardless, she decided to settle down beside her wife.

Then nothing happened. They sat with one another, waiting for something to be said or done.

Edelgard was the first to break the silence. 

“So,” she said quietly, lacing her hands together. “Regarding why I summoned you.”

“Mm?”

“It’s about… what you mentioned earlier. The whole ‘wearing my regalia indoors’ matter.”

Byleth’s eyes widened slightly, and turned to face her wife. 

“I’m sorry I behaved that way towards you,” Edelgard continued. “It wasn’t right for me to send you out like that.”

“No, I should be the one who’s sorry,” Byleth said, shaking her head. “I, um… made you uncomfortable, and...”

Edelgard chuckled, giving her wife a dismissive wave, “No need to concern yourself. I’m alright now. But please don’t try that again - or else you really will face the consequences.”

Byleth tensed, but a cheeky wink from Edelgard caused her to relax again. 

“Anyways,” she continued. “Now’s a good time to talk about this, isn’t it?”

Byleth nodded again.

“As you’ve gathered, my dress sense is fairly modest. I’m sure it’s obvious why.”

Byleth brought her hand to her chin. She sifted through her memories of the many conversations she had with Edelgard, from their confrontation earlier in the day to their first meeting at Garreg Mach. 

Then, she recalled one quiet, moonlit evening. Byleth had been wandering the monastery’s halls, when she found Edelgard standing nearby the bridge...

_In order to create a peerless emperor to rule Fódlan, they violated our bodies by cutting open our very flesh._

“That night back at the monastery,” Byleth muttered, bowing her head down. “You told me that...”

”Yes,” Edelgard interrupted, for she knew what her wife would say next. “That’s it.”

Once more, Byleth nodded. Quietly, she continued to gaze downwards, waiting for her wife to say something further. 

To her surprise, she felt Edelgard’s armor-clad hand slide onto her lap. At the contact, Byleth blushed; though she was certainly clothed, she could still feel the cold, hard steel of her wife’s gauntlets.

Byleth raised her head to look at her. 

Edelgard was doing her best to stay composed, but when Byleth focused enough, she noticed her wife’s arm quivered ever-so slightly. At a first glance, her expression also appeared neutral. Yet from the slight indent of her cheeks, Byleth could tell that she was biting the inside of her mouth, reining in her fear.

“El, what do you want me to do?”

“You have my permission to look,” Edelgard said, so quietly that Byleth could barely hear her.

“What?” 

“You... have my permission…” Edelgard repeated, a little louder. She took her time with every word she spoke. “To look.” With the final two words, her hand gave an emphatic press against her wife’s lap.

Byleth nodded. Slowly, she set her sights back on the hand that currently rested on her thighs. With her own calloused hands, Byleth gently lifted it. She didn’t notice Edelgard’s cheeks slowly turning pink. 

First came the gauntlets. Each of the little red rings were gently slid off. Byleth placed them on the duvet, right on the other side of her lap. Then came the plate that covered the back of her wife’s hand. It took a bit of time for Byleth to undo the tiny leather straps that fastened it to the hand. Eventually, it too was placed on the duvet.

All that was left was the glove. A pretty, crimson thing; made out of the finest silk. 

On paper, it would be much easier to remove than the pieces of armor that covered it. Yet Byleth hesitated as her fingers ghosted the garment’s cuff. There was a ringing in her ears, and her heart pounded wildly in her chest. What would come next? How would she react? Could El see that she was nervous, or…

Byleth shook her head to recenter herself. No, this really wasn’t the time. With one of her hands, she pinched the cuff, and squeezed her eyes shut. In one, swift motion, Byleth peeled the glove off. With her other hand, she continued to hold her wife’s hand.

The first thing Byleth noticed was that Edelgard’s hand was both very warm and very rough. Carefully, she traced her fingers across all sorts of bumps and ridges. Then, Byleth opened her eyes again.

She gasped quietly.

The hand that Byleth held was very pale. Or at least, the healthy skin was.

The rest was mottled with scars. Judging by the jaggedness of the cuts, a couple were from careless training accidents or wartime skirmishes. However, Byleth couldn’t recognize what made the vast majority of them. Though the marks varied from little nicks to large gashes, they were too neat - too _precise_ \- to be made by a blade or an arrow.

Then, Byleth noticed a puckered, circular scar in the middle of Edelgard’s palm. Like the other marks, she didn’t know what made it. But Byleth winced as she imagined the agony the original wound must have caused. Once, as a child, she had smashed her palm in a training exercise. Though she didn’t have many memories from that time, she did remember the excruciating pain that followed.

The worst of the marring lay on her wife’s fingers. Like the rest of her hand, they were covered in marks; but the skin was so blackened that it was hard to tell from a first glance. Byleth couldn’t even make out Edelgard’s nails. Thankfully, a cautious touch confirmed that she still had them.

“...They taught me dark magic in order to hide this, you know,” Edelgard muttered.

Byleth didn’t say anything back. She couldn’t stop staring.

“If anyone in Enbarr or the monastery had seen this, or anything else they did,” she continued, “There would’ve been rumors.”

Byleth remembered when Edelgard had passed her brigand exam. Back then, she wondered how she had looked so pristine, despite several months of training. Now she knew. 

“And Lysithea…?”

“Lysithea was taught the same spell. She told me herself.”

Quietly, Byleth nodded.

What was the right thing for her to say or do? Edelgard had trusted her with this - and the weight of her trust crushed Byleth’s chest. She was scared; scared of acting in bad faith, scared of hurting her, scared of reacting inappropriately. Hell, she hadn’t even _looked_ at Edelgard since she took off the glove…

Prompted by her thoughts, Byleth looked at her wife. Though Edelgard still turned away from her, she could see her tremble ever-so-slightly. Her heart sank. She, too, was afraid.

Without thinking, Byleth turned back to her wife’s hand. Gingerly, she lifted it with one of her own calloused hands and brought it to her lips. She heard a small gasp. In the corner of her vision, Edelgard had turned around, eyes wide with shock. 

Byleth held her kiss against the marred skin of her palm, quietly watching Edelgard relax as she got used to the gesture. She wondered how long had it been since someone had touched Edelgard so gently. 

Carefully, Byleth let her lips gently graze the bumps and ridges of Edelgard’s skin. Whenever she heard a quiet gasp from her wife, she stopped, waiting for her to adjust to the unfamiliar sensation. Byleth’s heart beat wildly against her chest. Half of the time, she didn’t know what she was doing; only letting her gut guide her through... whatever this was. 

She made her way to Edelgard’s fingers, feeling the skin underneath become rougher to the touch. Instinctively, Byleth brought her other hand to Edelgard’s hand, tracing soothing circles on her palm. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw her wife cover her mouth with her other, still-gloved hand, and… hold on, was her face turning red? 

Byleth stopped.

“El, is something wrong?”

“No, my light,” Edelgard muttered, slowly shaking her head. “Nothing’s wrong. This is just… overwhelming.”

Byleth nodded, “Do you want to tell me more?’

“Mm,” Edelgard replied quietly. “Just… let me figure out what I should say.”

“As long as you need.”

Edelgard turned away from her wife. From the rise and fall of her shoulders, Byleth could tell that she was taking deep breaths; steadying herself again. Once she finished, she turned back.

“Are you okay now?”

“I’m alright now, yes.”

Byleth said nothing but smiled, prompting Edelgard to speak again.

“I was very surprised, my love. When you… did what you did earlier. I never thought that…”

Edelgard looked down at her bare hand, turning it over to stare at her palm.

“Well,” Edelgard continued more quietly. “In all honesty, I never thought that you would be so gentle. To… _this._ I’m aware that this is foolish for me to say. You’ve been nothing but kind and supportive to me, whether it was at the academy or during the war. Even on our wedding half a year ago, you were like that. But what I know and what I feel...”

“El,” Byleth said softly. “I’d never reject you, okay?”

Edelgard nodded. 

“I know, my light,” she said, her voice beginning to croak. “I’m sorry.”

There was a pause. Then, slowly, Byleth wrapped her arms around Edelgard. With one of her hands, she rubbed circles into her wife’s back. In return, arms wrapped around her, and she felt a tight, almost desperate squeeze.

“El,” Byleth murmured, holding her even closer. “El, El, El…”

There was no response but a heavy, staggered breath. Then, Edelgard wept. Without words, Byleth continued to hold her wife, even as she wet her shoulder with her tears, or coughed and sputtered between cries.

Once Edelgard had finally calmed down, Byleth brought one of her hands to her wife’s head, gently threading her fingers through her hair.

“Thank you,” Edelgard quietly muttered. “I don’t usually get an opportunity to do this.”

“...Are you okay now?” Byleth asked quietly.

She got an affirmative hum in response, and couldn’t help but smile.

“That’s good,” she murmured. “Good.”

For the next few moments, the two women continued to embrace one another. It was still very hot inside the room; but neither of them noticed or cared.

Eventually, Edelgard pulled away from her wife’s hug. Once again, she thanked Byleth. Then, she took the glove, sliding it back onto her hand. When she did, Byleth noticed how her wife’s fingers curled and uncurled. She was clearly trying to get used to the feeling of the fabric’s weight again. 

Then, Edelgard smoothed out the fabric of her dress. She stood from the side of her bed, causing it to creak. Turning to Byleth, she coughed lightly; her cheeks dusted with pink. 

“I’m not opposed to doing this again,” she said quietly.

“Really?” Byleth replied, quirking her head to the side. 

“This is something that has weighed on me for a while,” Edelgard said. “I suppose it wouldn’t hurt for us to continue, um...” Her voice trailed off, and her brow furrowed. Byleth could tell that her wife was struggling to finish her sentence.

“...Exploring?” Byleth suggested helpfully.

“Yes, _exploring._ That is a good way of describing it,” agreed Edelgard. She hit her fist against her palm empathically. “Then, it’s settled.”

“What’s settled?”

“How about we continue this on my next break? It’ll be a month away, but you and I both know how quickly time passes.”

Byleth nodded. That sounded like a good idea. 

That aside, though... shouldn’t she and Edelgard be getting to bed soon? They both had another busy month ahead of them. Rest was of the utmost importance.

Apparently her wife agreed, for she was already making a beeline for the bathroom. “I’ll be cleaning up now, my light. Be sure that you do too; we have plenty of work waiting for us tomorrow.”

“Don’t worry, El,” Byleth replied. “I’ll catch up with you.” 

Edelgard smiled back. Then, she slipped behind the bathroom door, clicking it shut behind her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaaaaaaaand chapter two is out! (which will be followed by chapter three tomorrow. :3c)
> 
> i really enjoyed writing this chapter, particularly the scene between el and byleth in the bedroom. i feel like it sets up the overall tone of this fic quite nicely. 
> 
> other than that, writing hubert was really fun too. i love that spoopy man a lot...
> 
> i didn't ask for the previous chapter since it's more of an introduction than anything else, but... what did you all think of this chapter? i'd love to hear your thoughts!


	3. a change

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The next morning, both Edelgard and Byleth head back to their usual routines.
> 
> But why can't Edelgard concentrate on her work?

The next morning, it was back to the usual routine within the Imperial palace. 

While Byleth patrolled the streets of Enbarr to check that all things were peaceful, Edelgard cooped herself up in her office once again. After a day of rest, the sight of yet another stack of paperwork made every muscle in her body stiff. Such were the burdens of the emperor.

Edelgard gave a stifled yawn, then licked her gloved finger to pluck the topmost sheet off of the stack of papers closest to her. She brought it down to her mahogany desk, and squinted at the document’s contents; an offer from Petra on behalf of the kingdom of Brigid. 

Lately, the archipelago’s nautical industry was booming. From the number of words the young queen wrote, Petra was clearly enthusiastic about her proposal: to give two of Brigid’s finest ships to Edelgard. During their time together at Garreg Mach, Edelgard had watched over Petra, ensuring she was comfortable and well looked-after. It was only natural that the two women would later become allies, and more importantly, close friends. At the end of the letter, Petra invited Edelgard to Brigid to have a look at them for herself. 

Of course, Edelgard wanted to say _yes._ In the past, she had only visited Brigid for diplomatic reasons, so she never had the opportunity to explore the kingdom with Petra and Dorothea. But there was so much else to do that month...

For now, she’d have to put Petra’s request to the side. As a reminder to herself, Edelgard slid the letter underneath a stone paperweight that Hubert had gifted her for her sixteenth birthday. Then, she took the next paper off of the pile.

The following hours in her office went by without much fanfare. As usual, most of the documents that Edelgard went through were rather unexciting: sorting out petty disputes between noble houses, granting funding requests, and organizing conferences. Of course, with every case, Edelgard paid attention to the best of her ability. After all, she _was_ the emperor who was reforming Fódlan’s political system. 

But at her core, Edelgard was still a young woman. A young woman who would rather be watching a performance by the Mittelfrank Opera Company than giving Constance von Nuvelle advice on marketing her newest blend of rainbow tea. 

After Edelgard had penned her letter to Constance, she folded it into an envelope and left it on another side of her desk. She leaned back on her chair, wringing her hands together as she let her mind wander. 

Curiously, her thoughts drifted to yesterday’s events. A shiver travelled down Edelgard’s spine as she thought of how Byleth’s calloused hands brushed against her own. How warm and gentle her touch was. It reminded her of one of her childhood memories; one too faded for her to properly revisit, but which comforted and pained her all the same. 

Edelgard found herself wanting more of that touch. Carefully, she removed the armor and gauntlets from both of her hands, leaving only her silk gloves. She dropped the cold pieces of metal on her desk, having no intent to take them with her.

Then, Edelgard gathered her paperwork and stood up. She dusted the front of her dress, adjusted her hair, and left the office; making sure to snuff any stray candles along the way. With a determined stride, she made her way through the palace’s marble halls to her chambers. It was evening now, and Byleth would probably be back from her patrol. 

Once she reached that familiar pair of doors, Edelgard knocked once, then twice, then three times. There was a sound of footsteps, and then one of the doors opened with a creak.

“El?” Byleth whispered, peering through the tiny opening. “What are you doing here?”

“I admit this is rather unusual for me,” Edelgard whispered back. “But... I’m satisfied with my work for today. I thought I’d leave my office a little earlier than usual.”

“I see,” Byleth replied, bringing her hand to her chin. She opened the door a little wider, allowing her wife to slip through and make her way to their canopy bed.

Once again, Edelgard sat down on the side of the bed, smoothing out her dress. She noticed that Byleth’s hideous blankets were draped on top of the duvet, but decided not to comment. She had more important things to do than complain about her wife’s love for itchy, woollen things.

“I’d like to resume where we left off, my light.”

“You mean… like last night?”

“Yes,” Edelgard emphasized. “Like last evening.”

Quietly, she watched Byleth make her way to her side. When her wife found that Edelgard was only wearing her gloves, her eyes widened in surprise. 

“I thought this would be a little less troublesome for you,” Edelgard said, smiling softly.

* * *

As her hands hovered over one of the silk gloves, Byleth felt heat rush to her cheeks. Why was she so reluctant now? Surely the second time was meant to be easier than the first? Nervously, Byleth looked up at Edelgard for a response.

This time, Edelgard appeared fairly composed. If Byleth squinted, she could notice her wife’s nervous blush, but there was no doubt that she was more confident than last evening. When her gaze met with Byleth’s, Edelgard tilted her head to the side and raised her eyebrows inquisitively. 

“Well?” Edelgard said. “What’s keeping you?”

“I, um…” Byleth stammered. “I… don’t know.”

“You’re nervous, aren’t you?” she replied. “Usually, you’re nowhere near this hesitant.”

Byleth could do nothing but nod back. 

Edelgard chuckled. “It seems that I can read you like an open book now. Not a lot of people can attest to that, given how detached you are.”

“Not like _you_ aren’t either, El,” Byleth shot back. “Anyways, you’re nervous too.”

“And how do you know that?” Edelgard replied, leaning forward with a cheeky grin. “How do you know that I feel that way, prim and proper as I am?”

“Your cheeks,” Byleth answered matter-of-factly. “They turn pink when you’re scared.”

Edelgard gasped, pulling her gloved hand away from Byleth to squish it against her cheek. To Byleth’s amusement, her blush deepened.

“Am I really that obvious?” she said, frowning at the heat she felt coming from her face. 

“Well, it’s like you said earlier,” Byleth shrugged. “I think we know each other really well now.”

“I… suppose we do,” Edelgard quietly agreed. Then, she patted her gloved hand against her wife’s lap. “Anyways, shouldn’t we continue with this?”

Once again, Byleth focused her attention on the hand. The hesitation that she had felt earlier had disappeared. With a swift gesture, Byleth peeled the garment off. Then, she brought Edelgard’s other hand to her lap and did the same. 

With both of her wife’s hands now bare, Byleth noticed that they weren’t all that different from one another. Both of them had the scars, the puckered palm-marks and the bruised, blackened fingers. But she didn’t find them as shocking as she did last evening. Was she getting used to them already?

Likewise, Edelgard was less anxious today. Sure, her eyes were closed; but she didn’t appear to be as agitated as last time. Byleth’s suspicions were confirmed when she felt something stroke across her lap, and found her wife curling and uncurling her fingers repetitively. 

From here, Byleth didn’t have any idea of what to do next. Judging by Edelgard’s lack of action, she assumed her wife didn’t either. But neither of them were bothered by that. They were okay with letting things progress naturally, even if it meant sitting together and doing nothing for hours. 

In the end, they did exactly that. They only parted when night fell upon the Imperial palace. 

* * *

Over the next month, there was a welcome shift in Edelgard and Byleth’s relationship.

In the first week, Edelgard grew comfortable with taking her gloves off. She enjoyed the feeling of her skin against many textures. Silk, velvet, cloth, and of course, skin.

During the second week, things really began to change. One night, Edelgard made a throwaway remark; something about her dress and her back. After a curious peek under her wife’s cape, Byleth discovered that her wife’s dress had an opening; one where she could easily slip her fingers underneath the crimson cloth. Backrubs and sneaky touches became a common and eagerly awaited part of their nighttime activities.

In the third week, their activities grew more intense. Edelgard found herself taking off her shoes and her stockings so that she could lie down on the bed to embrace her wife. Both of their kisses and touches became more heated, more frantic. Yet Edelgard still kept her dress on. 

Of course, Byleth never had an issue with that. The two of them still had fun together, regardless of what Edelgard chose to show or hide. But it was becoming clear to Edelgard that she needed to address the matter soon.

To herself, Edelgard resolved to deal with the dress by her next holiday. Over the past month, she was pleasantly surprised by her own progress; and she _wanted_ to go further still. She was certain Byleth did too.

The question was, _could_ she go further? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i guess you could call this chapter the calm before the storm... 
> 
> really, not much to say on this one otherwise. i enjoyed writing edelgard's and byleth's dialogue here. i've noticed a distinct lack of friendly banter between the two in fanworks, when in canon they do it quite a bit (like in their a support!) so i hope i got that across... i've always liked that aspect of edeleth - it def adds a very natural-feeling vibe to their relationship.


	4. an evening (i)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The fateful evening arrives.

Edelgard sat on the edge of her bed, drumming her fingers against the back of her other hand. Lately, she hadn’t been wearing her gloves in the evening. She preferred it that way nowadays.

The month had gone by incredibly quickly. Now here she was, waiting for something to happen between her and Byleth tonight. 

Hopefully, that ‘something’ would concern her dress issue.

Just like the morning of the first day off, Byleth visited Enbarr’s marketplace. Meanwhile, Edelgard went to the library. From the shelves that towered over her, she selected a different set of books. 

Since she enjoyed Ashe’s recommendation of _The_ _Luna Knight’s Tale_ , Edelgard decided to revisit a childhood favorite: the _Loog Cycle_. One of the few memories that she had of Faerghus was reading the _Cycle_ in her room, swaddled in fur blankets to protect herself from Fhirdiad’s biting, cold winds.

That afternoon, she settled down to read _Loog & The Maiden of Wind. _But to her surprise and disappointment, the story didn’t impress her as much as it did when she was small. 

Did she not connect with Loog and Pan anymore? Was she too grown-up to enjoy the _Loog Cycle_ now? Or did she feel disillusioned with the tale’s portrayal of knighthood: as a chivalrous and valiant profession instead of one that required blind fealty to a questionably-intentioned ruler? 

Knowing herself, it could’ve been one, two, or all three of these things. Regardless, Edelgard returned the books to the library as soon as she had finished _The Maiden of Wind._ They were another reminder that the girl she once was died years ago.

A creak of the doors interrupted Edelgard’s train of thought. Hurriedly, she smoothed out her crimson dress as she watched Byleth make a beeline towards her bed. In anticipation, she shifted her weight on the soft, white duvet. She thanked her luck that her wife ignored the lack of itchy, ugly blankets today.

“How was your day, my light?” Edelgard asked.

“Good,” Byleth replied. As usual, her wife spoke curtly, but Edelgard didn’t want their talk to end there. There had to be some way to draw it out....

“Did… anything happen?”

“Nothing besides the usual,” Byleth said; again in that characteristically to-the-point manner. “Went down to the market in Enbarr, got a few things, then came back.”

“I see,” Edelgard said. She looked down at her gloved hands, and began to wring them together and apart. “What did you buy?”

Byleth smirked and put a finger to her lips, making a small shushing sound. 

“So it’s a secret for now, isn’t it?” 

Byleth nodded gently. “For now, yes.”

“Fine then,” Edelgard chuckled. “Keep your secrets.”

Once again, Byleth sat herself beside her wife, causing another creak of the bed. Edelgard couldn’t help but blush. Had she always been that beautiful?

Of course, she was objectively gorgeous. There was her tangled mop of hair, her toned physique, and those wide, blue eyes that Edelgard would willingly drown herself in if she stared at them long enough. 

Yet there were aspects of Byleth that Edelgard found even more beautiful. There were the calluses that lined her fingers, earned from a lifetime of hard work and training. Calluses that Edelgard loved to feel against her own skin; especially when they grazed against her scars. 

Or there was the way Byleth expressed emotions: subtly, without much fanfare. Unlike the expressions of her friends, family and peers, Byleth’s never felt too intense or tiring for Edelgard. There was a sereneness to them that put her at ease; and frankly, more willing to talk about how she really felt.

Ah, her mind was wandering again. Edelgard shook her head to re-center herself, and turned towards Byleth. She opened her mouth, ready to tell her wife about her plans for tonight, when-

“El,” Byleth said. “We’ve been doing a lot together this past month. Are you planning something special for tonight?”

Edelgard’s mouth hung open. “How… did you know?”

“You’re looking rather pensive today,” Byleth smiled. 

Edelgard’s lips pursed at her wife’s observation. “I suppose I have been thinking about tonight, actually,” she muttered. 

“What do you want to do?”

“I…” Edelgard trained off. Her brow furrowed as she tried to summarize the thoughts and feelings that currently swirled in her head. 

“...I don’t know,” she finally concluded. “I suppose we should just play it by ear.”

Byleth nodded in agreement, before scooching herself towards Edelgard. When she was close enough, she wrapped her arm around her wife, pressing against her. At the contact, Edelgard’s cheeks turned pink.

For a moment, the two of them laid still. Then, Edelgard leaned towards Byleth. Softly, she kissed her wife’s lips.

It took a couple of seconds before Byleth began to kiss her back, and just as carefully; a gentle grazing of lips against lips. Again, they took their time to indulge in the sensation, only breaking to breathe. 

Eventually, their kiss grew deeper. Though Edelgard had no idea who started first, she didn’t really care; the warm, wet feeling was very familiar and very welcome. At the back of her mind, she remembered the first time she and Byleth had kissed in such a way; that one night back in her office. 

That certain night, where an innocent question about rest had led to Byleth eating her out under her desk, which had led to her taking a monthly break, which had led her to tonight. It was a chain reaction of shifts in her relationship with Byleth, but more importantly, with herself. The newlywed Edelgard from half a year ago wouldn’t have dreamed of any of this. 

A calloused hand running up her back caused her to snap back to the present. Edelgard found herself bending significantly backwards, trying to accommodate for the kisses of her very eager wife. The angle she was at, combined with the weight of her clothes, put her on the verge of collapsing on the soft duvet of her canopy bed. Edelgard’s body grew rigid as she felt gravity threaten to push her over.

Immediately, Byleth noticed and parted from her wife. There was that concerned look again; her subtle frown and the smallest indent on her brow. 

“I’m alright, my light,” Edelgard said. “I only tensed because I’ve never done this before.”

That made her relax again. Slowly, Byleth brought her hand to Edelgard’s chest. She hesitated, looking to her wife for some sort of approval. Edelgard nodded back at her. With that, Byleth pushed her onto the bed. 

Before tonight, Edelgard had usually pushed Byleth onto the bed. It made her feel in control of the situation; and to her, control was comfort. Edelgard had the freedom to choose what would or wouldn’t happen; though she’d never do anything to hurt her wife. 

Yet laying flat on the duvet with Byleth draped over her, made Edelgard feel very warm, and very conscious of everything that was happening to her. It was undeniably arousing.

Byleth leaned down for another kiss. Instinctively, Edelgard brought her arms up, wrapping them around her and pulling her closer. Her hands ran over Byleth’s firm back, from the top of her collarbone to the bottom of her spine. Goddess, her muscles were so nice….

On a normal night, being together would’ve been sufficient for Edelgard. But tonight, she wanted more than kisses and caresses. That familiar heat grew more intense; that hot, stuffy feeling she felt during that night in the office… 

Slowly, Edelgard wrapped her legs around Byleth’s torso, pulling her even closer. Byleth noticed this, and stopped what she was doing. 

“Keep going,” Edelgard whispered. “Don’t stop now.”

Byleth nodded, and did as her wife instructed, dipping her head back down. This time, however, she went for Edelgard’s neck. With a few, pre-emptive touches of her lips, Byleth tried to find enough skin to explore. Eventually, she found her mark: a small patch just beneath Edelgard’s jaw.

The sensation of Byleth’s first open-mouthed kiss on what little skin she had exposed was electrifying. When she began to nibble, she gasped at the contact. She had been touched in this way before; but it still felt incredibly good. 

As Byleth left marks on her neck, Edelgard became acutely aware that the friction between her leather boots and her wife’s back must not have been comfortable. From the bed, she began to push herself up, and Byleth stopped whatever she was doing to watch. 

With a practiced motion, Edelgard leaned down to tug one of her leather boots off, swiftly followed by the other. They fell on the wooden floor. While Edelgard wiggled the stiffness out of her toes, she wondered why she bothered to wear such uncomfortable and unwieldy things in the first place. She could interrogate that later.

For now, there was another uncomfortable and unwieldy thing that needed to be dealt with. Edelgard brought her hands up to one of the decorative hair-plates that pinned one of her hair buns together. With a little tug, she freed it and the golden horn attached to it, before setting the elaborate ornament on the ground. Then, she carefully unwound the thick coil of bone-white hair that once wrapped around the hair-plate, letting her long locks float down and over her shoulders. She did the same routine for her other bun, before running a hand through her hair and shaking it all free.

When Edelgard turned back to Byleth, she found her wife blushing. The emperor couldn’t help but smile; her wife’s slight expressions were very, very endearing. 

“Did you like that, my light?” she asked teasingly. “Did you like watching me undo my hair?”

Byleth hummed, nodding emphatically. “It’s very pretty when you let it down like that…”

“I suppose I should wear it like that more often, shouldn’t I?” Edelgard said, twirling a lock between her fingers.

“Please,” Byleth replied, her blush growing deeper. Her wife noticed this, and with a little grin, she resumed her original position on the bed. 

“Come over here,” she whispered. “Let’s resume from where we left off.”

Byleth crawled over, and was just about to lean down again when Edelgard gently placed a hand against her lips.

“Actually,” her wife said quietly. “Before you start… could you do something for me?”

“Sure,” replied Byleth. “What is it?”

Edelgard’s ears turned pink. “Could you…” she trailed off, before gesturing to her wife’s leg. “Like back in the office...”

“You want me to do… that?”

“Mm,” Edelgard nodded. “I want this…”

Byleth nodded. “Okay,” she breathed.

Carefully, she slid her right leg forward, letting it settle comfortably in the gap between Edelgard’s muscular thighs. On contact, Edelgard let out a tiny, almost imperceptible gasp; and her face grew redder.

There was a pause as Byleth watched her wife get used to the sensation of her knee. Once she settled down, she began to move against her. 

For Edelgard, the gentle, rhythmic grind against her core was intense, but incredibly pleasurable. The friction of the seam of her tights and the cotton of her smallclothes rubbing against her made it even better. She could feel the material getting drenched as it slid back and forth - and her clit was already throbbing.

Edelgard brought down one of her hands to the band of her black tights, and slipped it underneath. She reached down to the swollen nub, and moaned as her fingers rubbed lightly across it, gathering slick across them. Goddess, she was already _this_ sensitive and wet.

Then, Edelgard felt the warmth of a hand - her wife’s hand - sliding over hers, only slightly separated by the fabric of her tights. Byleth pressed the seam harder against her clit, causing Edelgard to let out a moan much louder than before. She bucked her hips up to try and savor her wife’s rough touch. The waves of pleasure caused Edelgard’s vision to become blurry around the edges; she was beginning to lose touch with reality. Freeing herself of control still made Edelgard nervous, but she could handle herself much better this time. Besides, she was so, so close.

“Byleth,” Edelgard pleaded, her voice much higher and breathier than usual. “I’m going to-”

On command, Byleth picked up the pace, grinding both her knees and her fingers harder into her wife. The sudden change of pace made Edelgard yelp. Quickly, Edelgard came with a cry of Byleth’s name. She collapsed face-first into the soft confines of her duvet, panting heavily, and smiling.

Byleth waited for Edelgard’s breathing to become steady. Then she gently flipped her over, so that they could face one another.

“Did I do well?” Byleth whispered.

“More than well,” Edelgard chuckled, bringing her hands up to cup her wife’s face. “I daresay this was even better than last time.” 

Byleth’s head quirked to the side in confusion. Edelgard gave her a faux-exasperated sigh. 

“You know,” she said. “The incident in my office, a couple of months ago…”

As the event dawned on her, Byleth’s eyes widened, and she grinned. Or at least, grinned by Byleth standards. To anyone else, her expression would appear to be a normal smile. 

“Really, El?”

“Mhm,” Edelgard nodded, closing her eyes in relaxation. “I was nowhere near as nervous as I was the last time, too.”

For a moment, they stared at each other. Then, Byleth broke the silence.

“El,” she said quietly. “Can I ask something of you?”

“What is it?” replied Edelgard, her eyes still closed.

“I know you said we’d play tonight by ear,” Byleth said. “But… there was something I actually did plan to do.”

At this, Edelgard’s eyes opened again. “Tell me.”

“I…” Byleth swallowed. Edelgard could tell that she was struggling to come up with a sentence that wasn’t awkward. “Can we… can you…”

Noticing the furrow of her wife’s brow, Edelgard frowned sympathetically. “I promise I won’t react badly, my light.”

Byleth swallowed for a second time. Then, a third. Before she opened her mouth again, she took a deep breath, and her cheeks turned pink. 

“I want to see you, El,” Byleth finally said. “Without the dress. Tonight.”

Byleth’s words weighed heavily in the air. It took Edelgard a couple of minutes to process what her wife had asked of her; to remove the last garment that she adamantly wore. Sure, she did expect to deal with the dress issue tonight, but thinking about it and doing it were two different matters altogether.

This wasn’t like removing her shoes and tights a couple of weeks ago. After all, the skin on her legs and feet wasn’t all that different from the skin on her palms and wrists. But her wife had never seen the body that lay underneath her dress; something Edelgard had never shown willingly to anyone - not even her father, or Hubert. 

Edelgard’s mind was overwhelmed with hypothetical after hypothetical. She hadn’t been penalized for uncovering her hands, but she’d surely face consequences for showing off her body. Byleth would _not_ like what she saw underneath. Logically, Edelgard knew that these concerns were very easy to disprove; but she couldn’t ignore the inevitable anxiety they brought about.

In the end, Edelgard didn’t make any response. In fact, she couldn’t make any response. In any other situation, she would’ve known how to weave her words carefully, saying what needed to be said. But here, they squirmed out of her grasp; like the tadpoles she used to try and catch as a small child.

Byleth could tell that her wife was struggling with her response. Though she desperately wanted to help her, Byleth wasn’t very good with words herself. Instead, she let her gut instinct take control and began to unbutton her own blouse. 

“What are you doing?” Edelgard gasped, her eyes widening.

“I don’t know,” Byleth replied honestly, and continued to push each button out. When she had finished, she shrugged the shirt off gently, letting it pool to her sides.

Edelgard had seen Byleth topless before; so she wasn’t shocked by what she saw in front of her. There was her wife’s firm muscles, those familiar nicks and scratches on her arms and torso, and that mysterious, faded mark in the middle of her chest. Nothing she hadn’t seen before.

“I still don’t understand,” Edelgard said. “What are you trying to accomplish here?”

Byleth pointed at the mark on her chest. 

“That mark?” Edelgard asked. “What about it?”

“I…” Byleth trailed off, trying to explain why she did what she did earlier in the first place. “I think I got this from Rhea. When I was a baby.”

Edelgard said nothing, but gestured for her to continue.

“My father’s diary said that Rhea did something to me after I was born. You guessed as much when you were trying to find out more about me; but she likely did something to my heart. This mark, I think, is the scar from that.”

Byleth traced the length of the mark with one of her fingers. “El,” she continued. “You didn’t mind when I showed you this for the first time, right?”

“No,” Edelgard replied. She had a feeling where this conversation was going, and threaded her hands together nervously. 

“You know I’d do the same for you.”

Edelgard’s throat clenched. 

“...I know, my light,” she said softly, trying desperately to hide the shame and upset that threatened to well up in her voice. “Yet what I’m aware of and what I feel…”

“...are two different matters?” Byleth finished.

Edelgard nodded. “Yes. I know you want me to be happy, and I am. Just thinking about what I’ve done with you is exhilarating. But I can’t find the words for why I’m so hesitant now. I suppose it feels like I’m being asked to strip my soul bare in front of you.”

In response, Byleth wrapped herself around her wife. 

“Being vulnerable is… incredibly frightening for me,” Edelgard continued. “Sometimes, when I’m with you, I wonder if I’m making the right decision for myself. I haven’t been this open towards anyone else in a long, long time. As emperor, I feel like I’m not allowed to be weak. When I’m in love with you, I worry that I’ll be seen by my people as a dewy-eyed waif instead of the strong, infallible leader they want me to be.”

“But it’s just me and you here,” Byleth replied. “No one else is looking at you.”

Edelgard gave a resigned huff. Again, she knew that her wife wasn’t wrong, but there were only so many times that she could repeat “I know” without getting annoyed. She squeezed her eyes shut and brought her hand to the bridge of her nose, pinching it in frustration.

There was an awkward pause. Edelgard continued to hold her position, and Byleth continued to stare absently at her wife. In the end, though, Byleth broke the silence between them.

“What’s the verdict, El?” Byleth said quietly. “You never really gave me an answer.”

Edelgard opened her eyes, and looked back at her wife. She said nothing.

Realizing she might have put unneeded pressure on Edelgard, Byleth quickly added, “I’m okay with whatever you-”

“I’ll do it.”

Byleth’s mouth hung open in shock. She expected Edelgard would decline. “Wait, El… are you serious?”

Edelgard turned back to her wife and nodded. “I suppose it’s about time that I address this issue. It’s been going on for too long.”  
  
“Alright,” Byleth said hesitantly. Her brow furrowed. Why was she so nervous now? Hadn’t _she_ been the one who suggested this to Edelgard in the first place? Wait, did she pressure Edelgard into this? Oh, goddess...

Naturally, Edelgard noticed this change of expression. “Don’t fret,” she said gently. “You did nothing wrong. I do want to do this.”

Byleth gave a sigh of relief, but then a new, much more embarrassing question arose. 

“Um…” Byleth mumbled. “Where should we start?”

Edelgard chuckled, gesturing to the elaborate crimson dress she was still wearing. 

“Like you said earlier, my light. We start with the dress.”

“Or rather... we’ll start with the dress as soon as I’m done with you.”

“What do you mean-” 

Before Byleth could finish, Edelgard wrapped her arms around her torso. She brought her hands to the piece of cloth that wound around her chest, and hooked her fingers underneath it. Byleth hissed at the feeling of her wife’s skin against her own. 

With one deft motion, Edelgard pulled the garment off and over her wife’s head. She gave her a look; a hooded gaze and a small, but knowing smile. Byleth’s cheeks turned pink as it dawned on her that her wife was going to repay her favor.

Carefully, Edelgard leaned down to kiss the hollow of Byleth’s neck. She nuzzled against the toned fuzz of Byleth’s skin, finding comfort in the way she breathed in and out. Her kisses soon began to trail down her wife’s body, gradually turning into licks and bites that left behind sweltering red marks. At the back of her mind, Byleth planned a more conservative future wardrobe.

There was only a matter of time before Edelgard reached her wife’s chest. Between the two of them, it was no secret that Edelgard really liked Byleth’s breasts. They were soft, large, and wonderful for Edelgard to rest her neck against after a stressful day. 

They were also incredibly fun to play with.

Edelgard brought one of her hands up to one of Byleth’s nipples. Gently, she rubbed her fingers against the sensitive flesh, causing her wife to gasp her name quietly. This wasn’t unfamiliar to Edelgard, but it felt different this time. Without gloves separating her skin from her wife’s, Edelgard could feel how warm and soft Byleth was underneath her fingers. It was wonderful, and she didn’t hesitate in wanting more.

While Edelgard continued making circles against one nipple, she brought her lips to the other, before taking it in her mouth. No sooner did she do that when Byleth let out an uncharacteristically high, breathy moan. It didn’t take much longer for Edelgard’s ministrations to make her wife come with a staggered sigh. 

Exhausted, Byleth flopped back on the bed. Her torso was coated in a sheen of sweat and her breathing slowed down. As she began to recover, Edelgard crawled over to her side, bringing her hand down to stroke through her mop of blue hair.

“Was that good?” Edelgard said gently, though not without a teasing lilt in her voice. “You came rather fast.”

“Very,” Byleth whispered. “Very good, El.”

“I suppose I’m defter with my hands than I give myself credit for.”

“I’d say so,” Byleth replied, pushing herself up again on her elbows. “Though what we did earlier also helped, I think.”

“Well regardless, I’ve returned the favor.”

“And now… the dress thing, right?” Byleth said, cocking her head to the side inquisitively.

Edelgard’s smile disappeared. “Right. Yes. The ‘dress thing’.”

“El,” Byleth warned. “You don’t have to if you’re unsure-”

“No,” Edelgard said. “I want to. We’ve discussed this.”

Byleth paused. When she spoke again, she carefully enunciated every word. 

“You’re certain you want to do this?”

“Yes.”

Byleth breathed in and out to center herself. There was no going back now.

“Alright,” she said. “What should I do first?”

“I suppose you forgot what you tried to do back in my office, didn’t you?” 

With a gentle motion, Edelgard gestured to the golden, floral buttons on the front of her dress. 

“I’d like you to remove these."

Then, she added more quietly, “And… please don’t be shocked by what you see underneath.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and... here's the first of the NSFW chapters, haha! I hope you enjoyed it - there's still more to come.
> 
> i want to take a moment to thank [peixes](http://www.twitter.com/PEIXES_404) for the gorgeous art she made to accompany my writing! i apologize for not doing this earlier... (i can be pretty forgetful at times ^u^;)
> 
> she's got a piece for chapter 2 up right now, and there's going to be another lovely work that accompanies tomorrow's chapter. please look forward to it!


	5. an evening (ii)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The evening continues, and Edelgard takes a big step forward.

As gently as she could, Byleth pinched the top-left button of Edelgard’s dress. With some uncertainty, she rolled the golden piece between her calloused fingertips. She knew what would come next; she would take the button out of its hole of crimson cloth, and then deal with the other five. It was infuriatingly simple on paper.

The issue was with Edelgard herself. Byleth could see that her wife was trying very, very hard to stay composed. From afar, her expression appeared neutral, but her furrowed brow and tightly shut eyes said volumes about her true feelings. Byleth’s heart sank.

Then, an idea came to her. 

Carefully, Byleth leaned forward; enough for her wife to feel her face come close to her own. As soon as Edelgard noticed this, her eyes opened ever-so-slightly.

“Byleth,” she said softly. “What are you doing?”

“Can I kiss you?” replied Byleth.

There was a pause, and then Edelgard nodded. Byleth gave her a tiny smile. Then, she leaned in to brush her lips against her wife’s, and brought her hand up to stroke her cheek. At the same time, Byleth used her other hand to unhook the first button.

As the two of them kissed gently, Byleth grazed her fingertips across the front of Edelgard’s dress. When she felt the familiar sensation of cold, hard metal, she pinched, then pushed the button through the hole with her deft mercenary hands. By the time Byleth had finished making work of the third button, she felt the dress’s front panel begin to swing off. This gave her another idea.

Without looking down, Byleth brought her hand from Edelgard’s cheek and slipped it underneath the opening of her dress. At the contact, her wife gasped, but said nothing. 

Much like her hands, the skin on Edelgard’s torso was very soft and warm. It was also toned with muscle and the familiar bumps and ridges earned from battles and ancient, arcane surgeries. Furthermore, Byleth could feel some sort of cloth wrapped around her wife’s chest. From what she could gather, it felt similar to her own, but made with a finer, silkier material. 

She could find out what the cloth was later. For now, the rest of the buttons had to go. Byleth took her hand out of the front panel of the dress, and went back to work on the buttons. 

By the time she had dealt with the sixth button, Byleth stopped kissing Edelgard. Still not looking down, she wrapped her hands around her wife, reaching for the very back of her dress. There, one final button remained; one that secured the heart-like opening of the back of her dress. Byleth figured that unbuttoning it would make it easier for her to remove the top half of Edelgard’s dress. Swiftly, she unhooked it from its loop and let it fall free.

Then, Byleth brought both of her hands down, slipping them under the front of the dress. With a quiet hiss, Edelgard squeezed her eyes shut. From her reaction, Byleth assumed that her wife was waiting for her verdict on the self-declared monstrosity that lay beneath her crimson cocoon.

When Byleth saw what lay underneath, her eyes widened. She had expected marks similar to what she saw on her wife’s hands. And to be fair, they  _ were _ there; grooves of all shapes and sizes crisscrossing against each other. 

But she wasn’t expecting the giant scar in the middle of Edelgard’s chest. Though it had faded a little, it was still a long, thick and highly noticeable mark. What remained on Byleth’s chest was hardly comparable to...  _ this.  _

What was the right thing for her to do here? She looked up at Edelgard, and tried to get an answer from her. Maybe her wife would order her to do something, or say something that she wanted to hear. 

Edelgard was stock-still. The distant gaze on her face caused a shiver to run through Byleth’s body. Carefully, Byleth raised one of her hands and waved it in front of her wife. Edelgard didn’t respond.

Fear began to rise within Byleth. Given how sensitive this topic was for Edelgard, she worried that this would happen. After all, it had once before. 

Once, on an imperial excursion to Nuvelle, Byleth had invited Edelgard to walk along the beach. She had assumed that her wife’s reluctance tied in with her desire to work more; and to be fair, she hadn’t been wrong. Her wife had been keen on spending the night outlining her future plans for a certain noblewoman’s house. But Edelgard had not been not immune to a promise of sweets and private relaxation time. Later that day, the two of them had walked besides one another, along the seemingly endless shore that circled the seaside village. 

It was pleasant at first. As the sun began to set, they had talked freely about their feelings. What they had been doing at the time, what they would be doing in the future, what they had been proud of accomplishing, and what they had feared would come next. Edelgard had loved the little candied peach gelees Byleth had bought from a local sweet shop; and snacked on them as they left footprints behind in the sand. 

But eventually, Byleth had wanted to go walk in the shallower parts of the ocean. One of the few memories that she had had of her childhood was about the sea. How she had felt the ebb and flow of the waves against her ankles, and how her father had watched her from afar. Gently, she had taken Edelgard’s hand and led her towards the shimmering grey-blue body of water. 

Then something had stopped her from moving forward.

When Byleth had turned around, Edelgard had been frozen to the spot, silently staring into the distance. Only after she had carried her wife back up the shore did she find out that the ocean had been deeply frightening for Edelgard. 

“El,” Byleth said. Despite the panic rising inside of her, she tried to keep her voice level. “It’s okay. Breathe.”

Mechanically, Edelgard took a deep breath in, then out. 

And again. 

And again.

And again.

On the last breath, Edelgard slumped forward, collapsing onto Byleth. Quickly, Byleth caught her and pulled her close to her chest. 

“I’ve got you,” Byleth whispered repeatedly, hoping her quiet mantra would somehow calm her wife down. “Ssh, ssh, ssh.”

There was a tiny sob, and Byleth felt Edelgard curl into herself. Her wife’s shoulders shook, as she brought one of her hands to her face. In response, Byleth rubbed her bare back, hoping that her touch would soothe her weeping somehow. Much like the front of her torso, Byleth noticed that Edelgard’s back was scattered with scars.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” Edelgard cried. “I  _ want _ to be happy. I  _ want _ to enjoy this. _ ” _

Byleth said nothing. Without thinking, she leaned forward to press a kiss on the crown of her wife’s head. Immediately, Edelgard looked up.

“You can, El,” Byleth whispered. Then, she added with more confidence than she actually felt. “If you want me to, I can help.”

“Please.”

Quietly, Byleth brought her hands to cup Edelgard’s face. Slowly, she leaned in to kiss her. Before Edelgard could say anything more, she moved her kisses from her lips to her cheek, and then to her jaw. When she began to trail down from Edelgard’s jaw, Byleth looked up to check on her wife, making sure that she wasn’t discomforted. Thankfully, she appeared to be calming down. She was no longer tense, and there were the beginnings of a small smile.

That was enough for Byleth to continue her ministrations. Her mouth made its way down to Edelgard’s prominent, pale collarbone. When she got there, she felt her wife jolt a little, and stopped. 

Noticing this, Edelgard’s cheeks turned pink, and she coughed quietly. “No, no,” she said. “I’m alright. I’m just… getting used to this sensation.” 

Byleth nodded, and went back to work. Much like everything else that had happened tonight, she really did feel like she had no idea what she was doing. She only hoped that her wife liked it. This was a world away from that time in Edelgard’s office. There, she had felt much more confident, even if she was also acting purely on instinct.

Then, she tugged on the piece of cloth wrapping round Edelgard’s chest. After a shaky nod from Edelgard, Byleth unwound it, before tossing the garment to the side.

As soon as Byleth realizde that this was the first time that she had seen her wife’s breasts, her cheeks turned pink. They were small; small enough for her to cup one of them in her hand, which she did. At the sensation, Edelgard hissed, and Byleth took that as a sign to continue.

Slowly, she brought her lips to one of her wife’s breasts. As she kissed, Byleth noticed that here, Edelgard’s skin was softer to the touch. With one of her hands, Byleth began to gently stroke the other; using the pads of her fingers to play with the peak of her breast. At the touch of her fingers, Edelgard let out a tiny moan. Realizing what she had just done, Edelgard’s blush deepened, and she stoppered her mouth to muffle herself.

Byleth immediately took her wife’s reaction as a challenge, and decided to go a little bit further. She brought her lips down to the peak of Edelgard’s other breast, taking the sensitive flesh in her mouth. Hearing another muffled cry from her wife, Byleth took it as an incentive to continue.

But before Byleth could continue to lavish attention on her chest; her wife pushed her away. “Just for a moment,” Edelgard panted. “I think this will make it easier.”

Slowly, she leaned back to push the pooled sleeves of her dress away from her wrists. Then, to Byleth’s surprise, Edelgard went up on her knees and reached under her skirts. She couldn’t tell what was going on down there, but whatever it was, it made Edelgard’s ears go red. 

With some difficulty, Edelgard lay down on the bed again. “Come here,” she said quietly. Intrigued, Byleth crawled over to her wife.

Edelgard took a deep breath, trying to ignore the very noticeable blushing ache on her face. 

“My light,” she said carefully, in that tone of voice she used for announcements or meetings. “I’d like for you to do me a favor.”

Byleth looked down at her, and nodded decisively.

“I’d like you to take that  thing out of your drawer. The one you got at the market,” she instructed, carefully enunciating every word in her sentence.

Byleth did as she was told. She crawled over to the wooden nightstand and opened the uppermost drawer. Slowly, she took out a phallic-looking object; a toy, and a leather harness. 

Holding them up, she asked Edelgard, “This?”

“Yes. Now, come back.”

Byleth shuffled back, and waited for her next order. Edelgard took another deep breath, and paused. Then she uttered a command; one that shocked Byleth with its vulgarity.

“Fuck me with that.”

Byleth’s heart hammered against her chest. “Is that what you want, El?”

Edelgard nodded with certainty and parted her legs. 

“Okay,” Byleth said. “Your wish is my command.”

She hopped off of the bed to put the harness on. With some fiddling, the toy was fastened. As Byleth made her way back to the bed, Edelgard watched her intently. Among the leather buckles and straps that now entwined Byleth’s upper thighs, the toy bobbed up and down ever-so-slightly. Edelgard shivered when she thought about how it would soon be inside her. 

On all fours, Byleth crawled towards Edelgard until she was draped over her again. As soon as they looked at one another, Byleth blushed and turned away. Edelgard gently halted her with one of her hands.

“My light,” she said with a small smile. “Please look at me.”

Byleth nodded, and faced her again. Slowly, she leaned down to kiss Edelgard, muttering a tiny “Love you.” With one of her hands, she traced her wife’s body; from her cheek, to her collarbone, to her breasts, to her stomach, and finally to the seamline that connected the top of her dress to its skirts. Then, she brought her hand below them, tracing the very start of soft hair. Moving her hand even lower, she felt the silk of Edelgard’s undergarments, which were noticeably damp. 

Like that time in her wife’s office, Byleth ghosted the pads of her fingers around Edelgard’s sensitive nub. Edelgard gasped, letting out a tiny moan.

“Good?” Byleth murmured.

“Very,” Edelgard said softly. 

Taking that as a sign, Byleth continued to stroke the nub through the silk. Again, her wife stoppered her mouth with her hand; clearly embarrassed by the sounds she was making. 

Noticing this, Byleth murmured in Edelgard’s ear. “I think your moans are beautiful.”

“What?”

“I, um…” Byleth said hesitantly. “...I like them because they let me know you’re really enjoying what I’m doing.” Then, she added more quietly, “You’re also… very cute when you’re enjoying it.” To emphasize her point, Byleth pressed harder against the sensitive bundle of nerves, making Edelgard cry out.

“See?” she said, trying to be as bold as she could. “Very cute.” She slid her fingers underneath the silk, feeling her wife’s warmth and wetness.

“Before we do anything with what I’ve, um... got on,” Byleth mumbled, “I don’t want to hurt you, so…”

“So…” Edelgard said. “...You’ll use your fingers first?”

Byleth nodded. Then, she slipped a finger inside of Edelgard. It was only to the first knuckle, but she shuddered as she felt her wife’s soft touch. In response, Byleth pushed in a little further, hooking her finger to properly stroke Edelgard’s wet lips. Rhythmically, she moved it in and out; mimicking the motions of the toy that she’d later use.

Edelgard was happy to be touched like this again. Her wife’s fingers brought her as much comfort as they brought pleasure. As Byleth added a second, and then a third finger, she felt the wonderful sensation of being  _ filled,  _ and her face ached from blushing _.  _ When Byleth’s fingers slipped out of her again, Edelgard rubbed her thighs together, feebly mimicking their strokes.

“I suppose... I’m ready now... aren’t I?” Edelgard panted. 

Byleth brought her hand up to her eye-level; now smeared with Edelgard’s wetness. Then, she took it, and brought it to her mouth. 

“...I think you’re, um, more than ready,” she finally replied. 

“Alright,” Edelgard said. She breathed in, then out again. “This sounds ridiculous, especially coming from me…”   


“Yes?”

“...Will this hurt?”

Byleth looked down, and furrowed her brow pensively. “I... don’t think it will. But if it does, please tell me.”

Edelgard gave her a hard nod. With that, Byleth moved back to carefully part her wife’s legs. She knelt so that she could properly line up the toy; and again, Edelgard watched it bob up and down. It looked fairly ridiculous on Byleth, and she couldn’t help but let out a tiny laugh. Thankfully, her wife didn’t hear it. From the pink of her cheeks, she already looked extremely embarrassed.

“I’m, um…” Byleth stammered. “...going to go inside you now, okay?”

“Okay,” Edelgard said. She wasn’t sure what would happen next, but trusted her wife to be responsible, as she usually was. Carefully, Byleth shuffled forward. When the tip of the toy rubbed against Edelgard’s folds through her silk undergarments, she gasped. It definitely wasn’t something she was used to, but it wasn’t unpleasant either. 

Byleth paused again, mentally slapping herself for forgetting a crucial step. If she wanted to enter Edelgard, she had to deal with clothes first.

“This time, um, for real now,” she mumbled, trying not to make a fool of herself.

“Yes,” Edelgard said. Noticing that Byleth was hesitant, she gave her a reassuring smile. “This time for certain.”

With some effort, Byleth shuffled a little further up. Slipping her hands underneath Edelgard’s skirts, she pinched the top of her tights, and rolled them down her wife’s legs. She stopped only when they were peeled off of one leg; checking if Edelgard was alright with her legs being exposed. Thankfully, Edelgard didn’t look bothered, and so Byleth moved back up her skirts again. One swift gesture, and Edelgard’s silk underwear was nudged to the side.

Then, Byleth began to push the toy inside of her wife. 

* * *

The sensation was unusual for Edelgard; but also quite pleasurable. There was something comforting about the way the toy filled her. It made her want to wrap her arms and legs around Byleth. It would bring them both even closer, both physically and mentally. 

So she did just that. As Byleth pushed further in, draping herself over Edelgard once more, Edelgard brought her arms and legs around, and pressed her wife flush against her. The combination of physical contact and the toy made Edelgard smile. Though she would never admit it in public, she adored this intimacy, this warmth, this tenderness. 

As emperor, were she not constantly at work, she could’ve had anything she wanted; the finest sweets, the most coveted books, the most beautiful of flowers. But this...  _ this _ is what she needed.

“El,” whispered Byleth. “I’m going to move.”

“Go ahead,” Edelgard whispered back. “Move.”

Slowly, Byleth moved her hips to pull out of her wife. Edelgard shivered. There was that empty feeling again; just like when Byleth removed her fingers from her earlier. But she could wait; patience and restraint were nothing new to her. Those years of maintaining composure in public weren’t going to go to waste. 

To Edelgard’s relief, Byleth moved, and that comforting, pleasurable feeling of fullness was there again. As the toy entered her, she heard a wet slap; and when she realized where it had come from, she moaned freely. There was no point in silencing herself anymore; she really was enjoying this.

* * *

On Byleth’s end, watching Edelgard slowly come undone was a sight unto itself. Of course, this wasn’t her first time witnessing it. But back at the office, she hadn’t been there for most of it. It wasn’t easy for her to see through the several heavy skirts of her wife’s elaborate dress.

Here though, clothes weren’t an issue. Pooled around her waist, with her skirts hiked up, Edelgard’s dress wasn’t doing a very good job of covering her. Neither were her tights, which dangled listlessly off one of her feet, nor her underwear; haphazardly pushed to the side, exposing how wet she was. 

As Byleth picked up the pace of her thrusts, she found that the sounds and expressions Edelgard made were stunning. Her wife was blushing from her face to her collarbone, and she was smiling. If Byleth had been more confident, she would’ve told her wife that her flushed face was gorgeous, that she liked the way she tugged on her mop of blue hair, that her scent was at once comforting and alluring...

For now, though, she could settle with saying something that she knew was true from the very start.

“El, you wanna know something?”

“W-what?” Edelgard replied, her voice thick with arousal.

“You're gorgeous,” Byleth murmured, tears coming to her eyes. “Look at you...”

From the way Edelgard’s eyes shone, Byleth could tell that her wife wanted to say something back. But at this point, she was desperately close and could barely string her sentences together. All Edelgard could do was cling even closer and cry out. Taking it as a sign to be a more attentive partner, Byleth increased her pace. 

With an arch of her back and a sharp cry of Byleth’s name, her wife quickly came. Satisfaction and pride welled within Byleth’s heart. Her wife looked so comfortable and happy. And she was responsible for that.

As Edelgard recovered from her climax, Byleth looked down at her shyly, but lovingly. She waited for her wife’s breathing to become steady again.

“Did I do okay back there, El?” she asked quietly.

Edelgard’s eyes opened, and she looked up at her wife, beaming.

“More than okay,” Edelgard said. “You did a wonderful job, my light.”

Byleth smiled back. Then, she realized that she was still inside of Edelgard, and her eyes widened. 

“Oh, um, I should-”

“It’s alright,” Edelgard laughed. “Just take your time.”

Byleth nodded, and slowly, she pulled out, causing Edelgard to gasp. Whether it was the toy’s movements or her heightened sensitivity post-orgasm, she didn’t know. Honestly, it didn’t really matter.The two of them were well and truly done for the night.

* * *

After cleaning up in the bathroom and settling under the sheets and duvet, an important question itched at Byleth. She figured that now was the appropriate time to ask.

“Was tonight good, El?” 

“Yes, my light,” Edelgard smiled. “Thank you for helping me.”

“I’m glad,” Byleth sighed, and she felt as though a heavy weight had been lifted off of her chest. “Really.”

Noticing Byleth’s relieved expression, Edelgard asked, “Were you worried that I didn’t like it? What we did earlier?”

Byleth nodded quietly. Edelgard’s heart sank, and leaned in to wrap herself around her wife. She shivered when she felt how warm she was, and snuggled in further.

“I’d tell you if I didn’t like it,” she said softly. “Remember that time when I saw a rat, and you came in to check on me?”

Byleth nodded.

“You asked me if I was okay,” she continued. “But even after I told you I was fine, you continued to ask. I got angry at you for that.”

“Right…” Byleth replied quietly. “You told me that if that incident got out, you’d struggle to forgive me.”

“Precisely,” Edelgard said conclusively. “So I’d tell you if I was uncomfortable.”

“Mm,” Byleth hummed. “Sometimes, I just worry though.”

“I know you mean well.” Gently, Edelgard planted a kiss on Byleth’s head. “You’re very special to me, after all.”

“You’re special to me too,” Byleth murmured, cuddling into the warmth of Edelgard’s body. “El.”

“My light,” Edelgard whispered back, cuddling into Byleth. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Sleep began to take its hold on Edelgard, and her voice began to soften. Her eyelids began to droop.

“Oh, tomorrow’s a busy day. I’ll... need to remind Hubert to find a maid to clean our...”

“El, don’t worry - I’ll take care of it. Go to your office…”

“Thank you…”

With that, Edelgard and Byleth drifted off to sleep. That night, there were no sleepless walks or nightmares. Just two women peacefully entwined with one another, and at rest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and so, "ceremonials" comes to an end!
> 
> thank you for sticking with me for this project. it was a pleasure to write a sequel for "altar". i hope you found it a pleasure to read, too. :>
> 
> this chapter was probably my favourite out of the five. i hope i could get across what i wanted to with el's and byleth's relationship. 
> 
> and - please let me know what you think of the work overall! this was my longest work yet, and i'd really like to know your thoughts on what i did well/what i could improve on for future writing projects. 
> 
> that's all for now!

**Author's Note:**

> IT'S HERE!!!!
> 
> i've been working on this since April/May-ish, and now i get to release it - today!
> 
> a lot of things happened while i wrote this, but i'm glad i made it through to the end. i've always wanted to write a sequel to "altar", so i used the big bang as an opportunity to make it happen. and i'm very pleased with the results.
> 
> there will be future comments, but for now... i want to give a shoutout to these people.
> 
> \- sydney, mars and imani for making this big bang happen. thank you for letting me be a part of it!
> 
> \- KR, apple, ana and _especially PD_ for betaing my fic, and making it the best it could be! i think there are a couple more people who betaed too - so if you did do that, please lmk and i'll add you to the list. my memory isn't superb, haha...
> 
> \- all of my friends who supported me during my ups and downs. you're all awesome, and i love you dearly. 
> 
> \- everyone who reads and enjoys this. thank you for supporting my work as always. 
> 
> that's all for now!


End file.
